New on my Wishlist.

 

The art from Red Letter Words is making me think of adding art into my personal space. :)

These three pieces significant because:

Zephaniah 3:17 "...he will rejoice over you with singing." Knowing that Jesus loves me so much in order to rejoice over me with singing and delight in me; makes my heart insatiably happy.

Love never fails. It never does, ever.

"Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom." 2 Corinthians 9:17 The word freedom is important to me, really important. And this particular verse was in a poster in the school I was in while in St. Louis. So it also reminds me of a week in March where I was again, insatiably happy.

Red Letter Words also does customized stuff! So feel free to check it out!

called.

sometimes i stop and wonder why so much crap happens.
why i screw up, why others do...why we can't avoid it.

You say i'm called to be free, that i am called to those difficult places where my soul hurts and i am forced to see you in it.

i complain 'cause i'm a complainer (some of the time),
but i also can't help but express joy when promises like this
prove to be true. real.

thank you jesus for calling me into those difficult places,
for molding me to be more like you,
and for piecing me together in the places that are broken
when my life feels obliterated.

you, my daughter, are called to be free. 

and Papa, today, i choose freedom. :)

My favorite photo.

I still consider this my favorite picture I took when I still had my camera. I think it's because it's Imperial Beach, the beach of the United States that is split between the US and Mexico. I love it because it has two men on horseback (I always secretly wanted to ride a horse) and because it's a beach.
 I love it because it was taken at Border Conscious 2008, a time when God was molding me into knowing who I was in regards to who He is. I remember this trip and learning what it meant to love the people in Mexico, loving my brothers and sisters crossing the border, and learning that part of my identity is wrapped up in that. I love it because it gives me a picture of what I want: a beach, a horse, a Stetson, and just peace as I wave to the ocean, passerby... as of now, this is my picture of freedom.

untitled

i always wanted a man who would be there.
a man who loved and cherished me completely,
truly.

yet,
knowing, fully, painfully knowing
...

men of broken promises,
men who were not willing to fight to stay around
to convince my mom,
my sisters,
me-
that we were worth fighting for

whether it be through a divorce,
the frustration of not finding work,
a burnt dinner
or just a bad day

i was never sure of that:
was i enough?
was i worth it?

the small promises?
those counted too
they probably counted the most.
when you said you'd stop drinking,
i wanted to believe you
but when you'd come home
and swear it wasn't so
i smelled it on your breath

the wall came back up
stronger and taller-
resistent to your lies and your love

yeah, life has been hard
hard because all i wanted to know was love
love from You in the form of a father
someone who would call me beautiful and see me grow up
reminding me i was worth fighting for

that love?
it came too late
too late to penetrate what i needed at the time

but You-
you were so beautiful,
so strong.
You were exactly what i needed
and although i pushed, screamed, cried,
pretending it was okay

you showed me my worth
showing me i was  
too precious not to fight for

who are you?
you see the mess, don't you?
why you would choose to stay and speak truth is something i wouldn't do
you see, i'm not worth fighting for,
i shouldn't be worth it to you

maybe that is why,
when you and i
were searching to find
a friend to share a burden with
we found a refuge in each other

but see this was different
different since i saw you
i saw and see you for who you are
a man of God

and when I see you, i see a reflection of my Dad
the one who has never broken a promise to me
the one who reassured me that he loved me
and would set me free

the one that when i need it most
lets me cry on his lap
puts a hand under my chin and reminds me that it'll
be okay

and that is why i still hope
with a song in my heart,
tears of joy and expectation
in my Lord, my God

i was called to freedom,
and until then
i sing
and dance, laugh, and cry
in hopeful expectation
of never-ending freedom