this past week i cried a bit. alright, i cried a lot.
it was painful to feel my brokenness at every turn and let Jesus into that.
my friendships were challenging this past week, sometimes filled with joy- but i was very aware of the brokenness in myself holding back.
catalyst was a challenge, i wanted to isolate myself.
i wanted to not really be there.
but this is family... the people that love you. let them love you.
doug called us to bless each other... the difficulty of approaching my male friends and pledging friendship and trust was difficult but worth it.
i felt relieved.
so why am i back to that feeling of numbing/apathetic/disconnected?
i want to cry in order to feel some sort of release
but i really don't know what this is....
grief? loss? lack of peace?
i really don't know.
i randomly get quiet, which is usually an indicator that something's wrong.
today, i just wanted to listen and hear what You wanted to say.
What's up, God?